A popular meme that was circulating got more than a few laughs as it said ‘everybody wants a sugar daddy…until they have to give up some sugar’.
It is hilarious but definitely hits home to some, as many females talk about enjoying the good life and immersing themselves in certain luxuries like travelling to exotic locations. Few, however, are prepared for the realities of being with someone for purely financial gain.
When a female seeks a ‘buups’ or ‘brinks’ as they were termed locally, it comes with certain ramifications. The millennial term for them are sugar babies but who exactly is a ‘sugar baby’? The Urban Dictionary refers to a sugar baby as a ’young female or male who is financially pampered or cared for in exchange for companionship (i.e. sexual favours).’ For our purposes we will concentrate on the female babies.
‘Sugaring’ is the name given to the arrangement made in which a sugar baby provides companionship in exchange for being pampered and pampering can take several financial formats including having an allowance, gifts, spa days, tuition and even a direct investment into the sugar baby’s business venture.
It is all about taking cash and kind to care and on paper sounds like a great bargain but often the reality is that the man will require some ‘sugar’ for his generosity and nine times out of ten that sugar will come in the form of sexual intercourse.
The question then becomes is she prepared to sleep with someone she has no feelings for, no attraction to or has no sexual chemistry with, for the sake of monetary compensation? Can she wrap her head around it as well as wrap her legs around him?
For some onlookers, it is akin to high-class prostitution as they see it as selling ‘affection’ for money. Sugar babies and their lifestyle get a lot of flack for promoting sex work, patriarchal beliefs that a woman is only as valuable as what her sexuality can afford and glorifying women selling themselves to the highest bidder.
Others see it as liberating as the females get to choose who they want to be with, the terms and conditions of their ‘sugaring’ and being in charge of their own sexuality. Whatever side of the coin you prefer, the bottom line is that the piper must be paid.
Whether the man is attractive, debonair, looks like James Bond or is just a creepy, denture wearing cretin, once you have accepted his money, you resign yourself to being his sexual companion and all that it entails. If sex is not an acceptable part of your equation, it is not the thing for you.