7 things you suspect are fake about your date

You know he’s not the ‘right one’ because he’s not even ‘Mr Right Now’.

Not even an hour into the date and you already wish the waiter would appear with the cheque so it would mercifully end. It’s definitely a ‘one and done’ scenario as you have no intention of subjecting yourself to his company again.

They say real recognises real and from what you have observed, your date is as real as the cheap synthetic weave on your head. You can understand a few embellishments or exaggerations here and there but now you suspect there’s more fake than real. While no one is perfect, there are just too many glaring warning signs for you to ignore so you just play nice, stay quiet and hope he doesn’t feel for dessert.

Below are a few fake things you may have discovered:

1. Teeth: They keep slipping to the front of his mouth when he laughs.

2. His ‘bulge’: Probably packed with socks. It happens.

3. Name: He gave you one before you met and now his credit card bears another.

4. Education: Remember they are selling university degrees now.

5. Personality: You feel no authenticity in what he says and even his smile seems forced.

6. Career: So… he is not really a civil engineer but a ‘sanitation engineer’.

7. Net worth: His bank balance is probably less than yours.