How we (unknowingly) drive people away

Sometimes it’s difficult to see beyond our own personality and recognise that we may not be the person we think we are.

Have you ever met a couple and questioned their compatibility? One partner is super cool and the other is instantly disliked and you wish they would leave the room so the oxygen they sucked out would return.

Some people are just generally unpleasant and before you agree, have you given a thought to see if that statement applies to you? Are you generally disagreeable and difficult?  Do you have few friends, not because you keep your circle tight, but because only a few stick around a sourpuss? Has your spouse’s family been encouraging them to ditch you and get someone with a more winning personality?

Being mean-spirited can be a major part of relationships souring and heading towards a split.

If two out of the three questions are a resounding yea then maybe it is time you examine what you are doing wrong and try to fix it before it is too late. Yes, loyalty counts for a lot but sometimes even the most loyal people get tired of being peed on and being told that it is rain!

1. Being stuck in the past: If you are not going to forgive someone, then let that someone go. Harping on the past robs you both of a good future.

2. A Debbie Downer: Someone who finds faults in everything is no one people want to hang around.

3. Nagging: It is the number one mood killer so say it once and put a cap on it.

4. Being bitter: You may need some therapy to switch out the ‘i’ for an ‘e’.

5. Being negative:  The fun police stole their ‘mojo’ so they just go around draining people’s energy and enjoyment.

6. Chronic complaining: Every time you want to say something, think about its impact before you even open your mouth.

7. Being secretive: It can cause your partner to have trust issues and feel insecure if you hide everything including the little things from them.

8. Being mean-spirited or cruel: No one want to deal with that at all, so change is of paramount importance if the relationship is to be saved.

9. Being inconsiderate/insensitive: If she says her dog died, asking about what she will cook for dinner is probably not the thing to do.

10. Being tight-fisted (mean): FYI: Jamaican women are allergic to mean men.