Oh no, you didn’t!—When a woman shamelessly flirts with your man

You were looking forward to a nice evening out with your man; the mood, meal and music are all on point, not to mention the fact that he could give Idris Elba a run for his money with his fine self.

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You take a minute to go touch up your make-up in the bathroom only to come back to some woman dancing on your man with wild abandonment and it is taking every ounce of your self-control not to run up and drag her by her hair and show her some WWE Wrestling moves you learnt for just such an occasion.

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Yup, that green-eyed monster called lady jealousy rose up and slapped you silly and you are trying very hard not to go to that dark place where you catch a case.

You are trying to keep it classy but you are super upset and need some answers sooner rather than later. So what do you do now? Do you blame the female alone or does your man share the blame for allowing it to happen? What is your next move?

OK…We both realise that he’s fine

First things first: acknowledge that the woman picked him to flirt with because she also sees what you see in him, that he is a catch. This is actually a big compliment to you because it says you have good taste. Then count to one hundred and breathe.

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It is going to happen more often than you think because if he looks good, other individuals will be interested. Unless you intend to lock him away, you are just going to have to deal with it.

Guage his response to the flirting

Concentrate more on how he was reacting to her flirting. If he was giving as good as he got, then that can be a red flag. If he was caught off guard and seemed genuinely taken aback, then cut him some slack.

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Communicate clearly how you feel about the flirting

Do not let jealousy be your constant companion as it translates as insecurity to your beau and can develop a wedge between you which is the last thing you need.

Explain in simple terms how you feel about the flirting; that you did not like it and thought it was disrespectful. If he is down for you, that is the last thing he will desire so another woman will never get another opportunity to grind on him.

She’s not important to him – remember that

Also, you have to acknowledge that it was a random female that was flirting with him. He did not initiate the exchange or interaction and he does not know the person’s agenda. He cannot control what women do, but he can control how he reacts.

Flirt with each other

If he was flattered by the attention given during the flirting then you start flirting with him.  Sneak fervent looks at him and give him the ‘come hither’ glance and smile from across the room and learn to role play with your man to add some spice into the relationship.

Ensure that you do everything to hold his interest so that another woman does not stand a chance.