Pros and a con: Taking care of your bro’s girlfriend

In 1985, singer Bobby Womack released an album which contained the song I Wish He Didn’t Trust Me So Much which chronicles a man’s feelings towards his best friend’s woman. The friend had to go away for a while and so asked him kindly to look after his girlfriend in his absence. The song was the friend’s lament because while he valued his friendship with his best mate he had developed feelings for this girl and was finding it hard not to express his love for her. To say he was caught between a rock and his …private parts would be an understatement!  

You need to weigh if making a play for your best friend’s lady is in anyone’s interest.

So why would he need him to care for his girl in the first place? Well, maybe he has a job offer overseas or a scholarship that was too good to pass up. Or he could have been locked up at her Majesty’s pleasure for a while and want to ensure that she is well while he is playing ‘don’t drop the soap’. In a real life scenario, the word on the street would be ‘trouble deh deh’!  No good can possibly come from such a thing as relationships formed on someone else’s heartache.

Part of the problem is the friend is too trusting and should have probably left his sister or an older mentor to check up on his girl while he’s away. Old time friends would say you should never ‘rub butter pon puss mouth’ meaning you do not give certain jobs to someone who is easily tempted.

Expressing how you feel to her could end your friendship with her and your best friend. Is that risk worth it?

But if it happens that you have developed feelings for your best friend’s lady, you better weigh the pros and cons before you even open your mouth let alone your zipper. Ask yourself if she is so extraordinary, so precious that it is worth losing a friend for life? Is she worth being ostracised from your core group of friends? Will you be able to live with the consequences of your actions? Most importantly, what happens if you make a play for the girl and she rejects you flat out, then what? You know she is going to tell your friend, so can you whoop him in a fist fight or can you sprint like Usain Bolt?

The saying all is fair in love and war means that you can probably shoot your shot and hope for the best. You may have a case if your brethren was not treating her right, was unfaithful or just a general douchebag. No one can fault you for ‘saving’ her from a bad relationship. But if you just want to be selfish then be prepared to deal with the other thing that is floating out there which is karma and she slaps just as hard as ‘Miss Rona’ does.