When is the right time to introduce ‘bae’ to the kids?

Finding the right time to introduce your children to your significant other can be tricky, particularly if you don’t know how they could react.

You’ve been dating for a while and you realise he has certain qualities that make him good boyfriend fabric. Your friends met him and approve and even a few of your family members gave you the thumbs up. Things are progressing smoothly and he seems like ‘Mr Right’ but although he has the approval of those in your circle, he has not gotten the approval of the most important people in your life – your children.

Many relationships have gone south when parents rush in and try to blend families or move in people that their children did not know, like or spent any real quality time with. As an adult you do have the final say in your love life, but is ultimately easier when your children are also on board and willingly accept the person you intend to love and maybe later on marry.

Ensure the relationship is serious and will likely be progressing to the next step, whatever that may be, before introducing a significant other to your children.

So when is a good time for them to meet and greet? First thing to clear up is this; despite being the adult, you do not have the right to parade a bunch of people in and out of children’s lives. If you’re just looking for a hook-up, do not bring those individuals around your children. There are plenty of places for that.

Some experts say once you feel like the relationship becomes stable, then you can ease your way into it and do so without making a big deal out of it. If you want a timestamp, go for six month as that is enough of a window for you to figure out if you significant other is true or not. Just make sure that when it comes to the introductions do not be putting labels on it like “this is my future husband”, “meet your new daddy/mommy” or anything as dramatic.

There is no need for all of that pressure, start off slow. If the child asks you pointedly if you are seeing the person, do not lie as it can come back to haunt you. If they ask if you like the person, be honest while reassuring them that while you may be making space for someone else in your heart, they are still your number one priority.